This I Believe...

My essay.

I believe in being happy now.  That being said, one of my favorite pastimes is daydreaming;  daydreaming about anything and everything: what it will be like when I have my first solo gallery show, the emotions I will feel when I hold my first published book in my hands and the small cabin my husband and I will one day build on the prairie.  I float back to my current life in a haze of euphoria, having actually felt all of the emotions that come with the future realization of my dreams. 

I blink my eyes into focus and let them wander around my cluttered living room.  I could be cynical and dwell on all the things that irritate me in my life: the dog hair that never seems to go away, the pieces of wall that sometimes crumble off behind our sofa,  the fact that the owner of the local art gallery continually walks by my farmer’s market booth without a glance at my photos, and the notes for my book that sit neglected on my dresser ready to be molded into a best-selling book.

But this isn’t what I see.  When my eyes clear and I come back from planning my future, I rest contented knowing that my life is exactly as it should be in this very moment because I am not a cynical person.  I don’t see an endless sea of dog hair, I see my loyal dog who loves me unconditionally and is always excited to see me when I come home.  I don’t see the crumbling wall, I see a house that my husband and I are turning into a beautiful home.  I don’t see the owner of the gallery ignoring my work, I see the countless people to whom my work brings joy every Saturday.  I don’t see my book full of empty pages, I see the wondrous road trip I took that inspired the as-yet-to-be-written book.  

I’ll never stop dreaming, scheming and planning because I believe one day the things I wish for will be now.  In this knowing, I can be contented that for now I have a roof over my head, delicious food on the table, people in my life who love me and accept me just as I am, a healthy body that enables me to stay active and a mind that prompts me to seek beauty and appreciate the small things.

I believe in seeing my life through rose-colored glasses.  I believe in being happy now.

***This I Believe is an international organization engaging people in writing and sharing essays describing the core values that guide their daily lives.  Over 100,000 of these essays, written by people from all walks of life, are archived on their website, heard on public radio, chronicled through their books, and featured in weekly podcasts.  The project is based on the popular 1950s radio series of the same name hosted by Edward R. Murrow.  (from thisibelieve.org)